Mirrors
by MissMary
Summary: This is a oneshot where Lloyd thinks of what would have happened if he had lost Collette.


**Mirrors**

I wrote this story for my video player, who wanted a story where Lloyd realizes that he is Mytho's mirror, as Mythos said is his dying statement

I lie beside her and watch her as she sleeps. She's a little more rounded than when we were younger. There for a time we were all lean, during the journey, and she most of all, but she has stayed near the Tree for most of the time since it was reborn. Martel said to love the tree, and who better to care for it that the one who cares so easily for every living thing? She's just as clumsy as when we were on the journey. I make sure everything is sturdy, and that the breakables are on high shelves. After all, we can fly to get them if we need them.

I watch her sleep and think of how she had waited patiently for me all these years, as I searched for the Exspheres and dealt with them as they needed to be dealt with. I still carry the Angelous Crystal. To everyone here, she is still the Chosen, as Zelos is still the Chosen, who went on their journey and renewed the world. She is an angel to everyone, strong and bright with the love of living. . That does not mean she cannot defend the Tree, if it needs. For the Tree, she can be terrifying. Silverant and Tetha'ala prosper; with prosperity tolerance is beginning to grow. Raine and Genus, being heroes of the Renewal, have done much with their goal of fostering tolerance for half-elves. We all help. Genus lives in Tetha'ala now, since Presea accepted his last offer of marriage. She told Collette she had to wait until she knew she could care for him as much as he cares for her. Young and old and wise, Presea was beautiful at her wedding. Genus glowed. Raine and Collette cried.

Zelos has never managed to shed the title of Chosen, because he needed it to help. Instead he grew into the title. Both he and Collette have insisted that there will be no more Chosen. There is no need. There is no longer a need to renew the worlds, now joined. We- all of us- have fulfilled that task. Zelos helps with getting equality for half-elves, and with dealing with the problems rejoining the worlds has caused. He gets a little pompous sometimes. Sheena visits as much as she can, and she will smack the pompousness out of him if he needs it. For a time, their passion flared; for a time, they were together; then their changing responsibilities came between them and the passion died. They are fond friends. Zelos married and has two children, and Sheena tells Collette that he is faithful to his wife. Sheena married and has one child. Regul has remained faithful to his lost love, and is a close friend to Presea and Genus.

I get along with both of my fathers. Kratos visits sometimes. He travels, searching for the dark places where magic has soured and must be cleaned, and finding the worst monsters. He will call to me and the others for help if he needs it. Dirk is where he has always been; we go to see him as often as we can. He still makes me repeat the dwarven vows before I can eat dinner. Collette has them memorized and drills me the day before.

I try not to think of the journey most of the time, because so much of it hurt. Only at times like now can I remember, with her safe beside me. I think of Mithos, how he said, before he died, that I was his dark shadow. He said he did not regret and that he would do everything again the way he had. I want to believe that he was wrong. But now, as Collette sleeps, I can remember how eager I was to go with her on her journey, how much I needed to be near her even though I knew I would be parted from her when she became the angel. I remember how I rebelled when I found out Collette had to die to become an Angel. I remember how frantic I was to cure her from the blank slate she was , with her mind and soul walled away inside her, to make her a vessel. I remember the joy I felt when she broke through the wall to defend the necklace I gave her. I remember how she turned to me when she was becoming a monster, and how her joy in life returned when she was cured.

I remember how, when they rescued me from Yuan she rushed up, wanting to know if I was all right; how she comforted me when I found out that Kratos, the one who betrayed her, was my father. She told me once that when she talked of saving the world, she thought of me.

That journey changed me from boy, to man, to angel. Strange, that Mithos, who helped us because of Genus, called me his shadow. I am human, if the son of an angel. I was raised by a loving mother and then a loving father. I was not rejected by those closest to me for no reason other than the birth I could not help. Genus was the half-elf, the one rejected by his mother and father, and raised by a sister, as Mithos was. But I _was_ his shadow. I had his passion, his determination, and his strength. I was determined to save the world, and to save my loved one. But he was twisted at the end. Twisted into thinking that destroying youth after youth to create the vessel for his sister's return was right, because he needed her. Twisted into thinking that destroying the feeling in all people was the way to peace. He could not see that he did not have the right to control others, even if it bettered their lives. I want to make the world better so that people can make good choices for their own reasons. He divided; I joined. Yet he chose to die, and in dying, make me strong enough to heal the worlds and meld them into one. And it was the destruction of the vessels to re-create Martel that the Tree was reborn, using their otherwise wasted lives for creating. Martel was appalled at what Mythos had done to bring her back., as Collette would have been.

I am Lloyd. I have always been Lloyd, and will always be. But I am not the boy who began the journey. While in the beginning, Collette changed greatly, I was changing; then my changes came all at once, as hers had. We were rare ore refined into iron, and then hammered into steel. When I have been fighting, I see Kratos look at me in pride, and my friends look at me in respect, and the rest of the world in awe. They see Collette as the gentle angel, myself as the avenger, the warrior. Collette and I offered our lives to save the world. The others offered theirs so that we could be strong enough to make that sacrifice if it were needed- Raine, Genus, Sheena, Presea, Regul, and Kratos. Can anyone understand what that was like? To walk away from your friends, because you had to. Zelos will never understand how much I owe him for rescuing all of them but Kratos, nor Yuan for saving my father. Perhaps Boda would understand. He died saving us, after all. But he knew that their way was wrong, was not working. He gave me the chance to change what he could not.

I wonder, sometimes, if Mythos was right. Would I have become the bitter, selfish monster in angel's guise he became, when Collette died? I went berserk, for a time. I know that if I had lost her, I could have destroyed the worlds to avenge her. I certainly would have destroyed Ygddrasial.

I watch her and think how easily I could have lost her. How easily I could have laid the world waste, seeking a way to rejoin her in death. Instead, I sought to renew the world so she did not have to die, and then knew that saving the world was larger than both of us. We ended still having each other.

Life is uncertain at the best of times. I have her now. We have remade this world in our journey, and we will continue to refine it, she by protecting the tree, I by cleaning up and rebuilding again what was hurt in the reunion.

I have her now.

That's enough.


End file.
